Friday, April 23, 2010

3:14a : Pin drop thoughts

3:14a. Wow. I should be sleep. I give a great yawn and roll my head once around. Fingertips get to talking and soon the blogging is on, yes it hath begun.

I open my rather weary eyes and cock my head to one side as I type and listen to the bathroom light I've managed to leave running. What do I anymore have to say? Is my voice still there? I have not used it in some time...I sift through the moral compass of my heart and wonder if I've currently made some moves that have promised no one light, love or freedom.

Freedom. Sounds like such a free word, but oh such heavy price to pay, especially when that price is that relationship that could have done this amazing thing but instead, did not and in fact hurt alot of people in the process.
I stand and walk towards my dimly lit room, a shadow of its former self after having thrown away all external coverings. Now not only did I throw away the sheets, I tossed the pillows as well, and with a minimal amount of money, I decided to press on anyway. It needed to be done since it signaled a certain end of a certain energy I had been trying to shake and move for some time. New pillows, new shams, new covers, new color. Oh it is gonna be great to lie in. Alone. Hmmph.

...Well, I did say I threw a lot away... I hope not as much as I feel...

New opportunities await me. As I walk into the kitchen, fragrances stimulate my memory of the kitchen representing comfort, creativity and opportunity. Maybe that's why I stand in there so often.

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