Monday, December 3, 2012

Sliding into Contemplation.

Contemplation: The action of looking at something thoughtfully for a long time; deep reflective thought.

The newness of Spring hath sprung; the trees bloomed full and children played well in summer. The air turned crisp and thoughts of securing the harvest and planning for the holidays set in. A festive spirit hit our field of consciousness....and then for some, dissipates into the quiet solace and contemplation of a new season, winter. I hear the rain falling, and I know my place.

This is where I am.

It seemed to all become very clear today, as I was hustling and bustling in the kitchen, making mashed cauliflower, sweet potato fries, kale chips, brussels sprouts, flavored greek yogurts with walnuts and cinnamon, veggie soup and corn. Kai and I washed towels, cleaned the turtle tank, spruced up our balcony and vacuumed. The washing machines were full when we first walked down, so I took the opportunity to clear out my car. I even washed dishes and swept the floor. Whew!! I didn't think the day's chores would end, but Kai and I managed to create a very good flow of activity, from a late rise to a late night writing spree. One thing I knew for sure, was that I would sleep well and welcome the new day with lightness and joy.

I also know that, the more I cook and prepare now, the better my winter season of hibernation and contemplation can commence. I don't want to do these things over my break. I only want to read, research and contemplate, as the downtime between all other daily duties. However, the cleaning is my moving meditation. It focuses my mind on important things, like my next step in the wheel of changes.

I feel my soul deeply purging. It is starting to rummage for unanswered questions. Summer and Winter both bring this search out in me, this hunger for all things profound and unanswered, far reaching and mysterious, as mysterious as the night Christ was born. It is even more interesting that some very healing and grounding oils such as frankincense and myrrh were given to the Christ child, which would enhance his powers of intuition and wisdom.
Maybe this was the reason for cooking the vegetables, in order to get into a deeper state of being with the earth. Since I am embodying the epitome of health, I am living and honoring this way of life within me with regularity, knowing that the Universe senses this response and works with my flow to create greater waves of positive change, using myself as the consciousness tool, the role model. This essay of thoughts is a work in progress.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Communication at the heart of Relation

I feel as if I have just won Relationship Scrabble.

This profound breakthrough in communication seems to be the thing I needed to find my peace again as a person who prides herself on being able to keep strong communication in partnerships. The problem for me had always been one of noticing that my relationships were still failing, skipping a beat and then ending. Isn't communication supposed to improve and maintain the status of a healthy, working union? I'm going to say yes, and then proceed in the idea that more communication can only help the intimacy grow.

My partner and I had several long discussions this week and it made all the difference in the questions we held for each other, like missing puzzle pieces. I was made aware today, of how I am teaching my partner how to ask the right questions when approaching situations and feelings that the process of intuition weren't answering. That's the other thing I noticed: intuition opens the inner sight to the world surrounding, and the individual's task is to see it, not necessarily for that picture to draw a straight path leading directly to the door with the answer behind it. Sometimes the search must be pursued.

In relationship I've been seeing how the search must be pursued and the right questions asked, in order to obtain the clearest response possible. If the right question is not asked, the right answer will not be gotten. This, to me, is the simplest truth I have agreed upon. This is also keeping in mind that the answer one is seeking, is dependent upon the answer one may have subconsciously decided and previously agreed on, based on past relationship experience. The toughest part is how the heart decides to render the current information based against personal history, be it successes or pain. Since I find this information in the past, I can probably register it as some form of pain, and for me, this means one or two things: pain is either the motivator, or the inhibitor, in relationship decisions.

When I explained to my man, that his current actions incited fear in my response to him based on my past, he understood after a rather lengthy explanation of what it meant. So I showed him a map to my front door, because he had been using his intuitive processes to discover my world, but not to the point of getting a direct reason for some of the rifts being caused. Then he showed me a map to his world.

I had been wondering why I was not quite able to successfully soothe the waters over an extended period of time, but now, given this new idea of actually taking the time to draw out the map, could help a future talk become a very clear and hopeful discussion. At first it seemed like such a no-brainer...but then, I looked at how much time I sometimes spend on trying to figure things out without details. Spirituality and intuition in relationships isn't always about knowing details. Instead, I can accept that it is more about asking the right questions.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Touch It Once.

I mean to plan every day. I finally make this incredible list of to-dos, and then it fails me. Or no, wait, I fail IT. It? My to-do list? Yes. I don't get even three things done off of my list, and then it gets upsetting to see this, day after day, the feeling of failure continuing to hit, when that same to-do list has not yet been ta-done.

I read an article just recently, about how we set our perceptions to the "FAIL" dial, by affirming these negative thoughts on a fairly consistent basis. "I'm tired." "It's so hard!" "I'll never get this done!" "She's always late to everything!"

What if we made a different choice? If only for one moment in time, what type of success could we have if we focused on what was successfully being done? What if we focus on what we know we can accomplish, without question? What if we used a Huna technique called "touch it once" and moved that project out the door forever?

It would require the busy part of our brain to be quiet, so we could focus on doing that one thing well. When we are driving or sleeping, eating or typing, it is tough to try doing anything else in that moment. So why not be in the moment and just touch it once?

This requires that we choose to shorten our to-do list, and, just for today, we decide that nothing else is more important than getting those three things done, and not an entire list of items.
Now we may find that we are infinitely capable of doing more, but to focus on the three most important items on your agenda may be the answer to a lifetime of lists that never get completed. Then, instead of carrying around the negative sentiment of "I never finish completing my list," you can say something like, "Oh, that? I've already crossed three items off my list today, and I feel absolutely amazed at my progress." Just a thought.

Monday, November 12, 2012

The official entry into the 40s...the real "F" Bomb.

We are all works in progress.

Having said that....
I write this post as an ode to the past and a nod to the future. I stand in today, with my head erect. I realize that I really do know who I am and I know that an age isn't a real marker of accomplishment. In the long run, it has maybe more to do with how many lives you could impact. I just think that at 40, it starts to become a real push, like half of your life might be over, and it's time to get to the business of helping people grow.

Yeah, so I did think to myself, that I had goals I wanted to hit by today. Simple goals like cleaning my house and throwing away clothes and furniture, or finishing a certification, reading a book. The even larger goal is being the business entity of Blissfully Fit. Yeah, I wanted something done by today, and I'm not completely sure I did that.
But there are a few things I did do, and I'm honestly quite grateful for all of these things. Firstly, I hugged my son and told him I love him. Secondly, I had an amazing birthday night with an incredible man. Thirdly, I have been exercising my heart out, and people frequently tell me how youthful I appear, even when I open my mouth to speak. Yes, I have decided, it's still a compliment.

So what did 40 really bring me? It brought me a series of awarenesses and subtle revelations that affirm my purpose on this planet. It helped me realize that it's not over, not even hardly, and that I still have the life and the love within me to keep pushing for higher and more important goals if I am choosing this, which I am.

40 means something special to me. It means that I've made it, without really getting any older at all, but more eternal.

Neutralizing Negativity


You know, it's about that time to have that talk when the holidays start coming down the pike, and I have to remind everyone that this is the time of year to do exactly this: SLOW DOWN.

Yes, that's right. I don't mean to sit down on the couch or face down on the bed without any movement. I mean, focus your mind and thoughts towards your goals and plan carefully for the spring of your winter's current if that means that you don't feel your exercise and nutrition plans are going quite as well as you may have expected, know that it's only part of the solution to health. Your emotional, mental, and spiritual wellness means just as much.

No, I'm not talking about having to go to a church or stop being emotional or that the thoughts running through your head have to stop. I mean, this is an excellent time to pull all parts into balance. Truth is, I can't write while I'm jogging, and I can't sleep while I'm exercising. There is a time and a place for everything, and

YOU HAVE TIME TO DO IT ALL. You really do.

You just have to know that there is a plan beyond yourself and you are fulfilling it, each and every moment of the day. Now. Can you accept that? Or will you fight this truth, tooth and nail?

Another truth is that our negative self-talk begins to permeate our existence like a poison. Haha. I said, OUR. We all do it. I do it at times when I am not even aware. I have a few best friends to apologize to today, in fact....Yes, it is important to be heard and to be understood. At a certain point however, you might try working a bit harder to offset a particular response that your body tends to use, in order to protect yourself from potential harm.

The kidneys really take one for the team. The kidneys produce cortisol, a hormone that kicks up during a physiological stress event, like exercising, along with adrenaline. Both of these hormones create the fight or flight response in the chemistry. Now, I just heard a workshop given by a phenomenal doctor that made me remember why so many people seem to be responding from this stressy, angry, fearful place, a place we learned to respond to as children. And believe me, we want these fears assuaged, or at least we think we do. But everytime they are, we are being told that those fears, and that emotion, is not okay to have, so we never end up healing from it.

Instead, we carry this stress response into our adulthood and we act out fears and create these boundaries around our fears that keep us in this safe little box, that over time, shows itself as fairly unreasonable. With every negative interaction, like a putdown for example, even if it's not meant to be taken seriously, coming from yourself or others, incites the cortisol response.

Now how much more stressful do the holidays need to be?

Do yourself a favor and enjoy the moment in the day when you feel guided to sit down. When you do, take a deep breath, say a quiet affirmation, bless the affirmation with gratitude, and forgive yourself. Remember what this season is for, and remember how much I Love you.


Friday, November 2, 2012

What would you do with 15 minutes to live?

Obviously, this is only a when, and not an "if" question. I asked my kids this question as we stepped into El Dia De Los Muertos, November 1st and 2nd. My students got a little wiggy on me because I asked them to reflect on their deceased loved ones yesterday. The answers were touching and beautiful.

So, on reflection of this question, a tear threatens to leave my eye because when I wrote the question for my students today, I at least gave them time to decide whether they wanted to make the most of this life, because some assumed I meant death would soon be imminent. I asked them what they wanted to accomplish, who they wanted to help, how they affect people, how they change the world by their mere presence, and how others, maybe a bit more philanthropic or famous, have helped to complete change the world. My students wrote some amazing responses.

And now, down to its last 15 minutes...telling everyone I could reach that I loved them and holding my son, would be two things I'd want most. Telling his father that he did a good job would be another goal. If this last fifteen minutes would be before my parents died, I would tell them how I know they did the best they could and how incredibly proud I am of them for every accomplishment they overcame, and how I saw myself in them every day of my life and how grafeful I am that we all made it to this moment. I'd thank my dance teacher for the gift of creativity she unlocked in me. I'd pray for all my family, friends and clients and ask the Creator and spirit guides if we could all watch over our loved ones from the beyond.

I would want to write a short letter and have students pass the letter to one another, letting them know how much they mean to me, and how a simple smile has made all my experience worth going through, the rough education and financial burden worth taking on, and life worth living to such a degree they could never understand.

I would say a special thank you to my ex boyfriend who played the source of unconditional love in my life,and then turn around and thank my current boyfriend, for becoming the exceptional man he is becoming under my watch, and to be happy with all that is left, and not to sit around and mourn my death, for it is only temporal...
After this, my guess is that I would live a while longer, because my heart would be filled with so much love that my veins would be deeply flowing. Sounds like a wonderful plan.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

The Chronicles of Food #1

Plan, plan, plan. Prep, prep, prep. Eat. Eat. Eat. Time it. I ate too little! I ate too much! Weekends are for pizza! Do I have the money to support my current eating habit? Do it again.

I look over at the kitchen, which sits in the bagua feng shui map in sector 4: knowledge, wisdom, self-improvement, Saturn (representing discipline). Last night, I cooked firm, salted tofu with olive oil, quinoa with tumeric, hard boiled eggs, and mixed dried cranberries into a cup of cottage cheese. I cut into a cucumber that somehow got frozen, in my fridge! Not sure how it happened but a beautiful piece of produce was completely ruined! No, I did not decide to give it a proper burial, unless the trash is sufficient.

I am beginning my brave journey of actually logging my process publicly. I've always admired people who chose to take basically near naked photos of themselves as they whittle their bodies down into sexy healthy goodness. Even though I have always been in the fitness industry, fitness for me was never about how cut I could get, but instead, how functionally strong I could be. It's not that I'm becoming shallow in the shadow of my 40s, but that I see a different purpose and method to my madness, now that my body has proper healing time. I was teaching too many classes, doing too much cardio, and basically burning my body out. Looking back at my life, my body was not behaving well. It was not properly assimilating macro or micronutrients. I was not eating enough proteins, and sometimes simply overeating.

Just recently I decided that enough was enough, and that it was no longer enough to just keep saying to myself that it was just be vegetarian and lifting weights. No. I needed a nutrition plan that worked for me without making me feel like I needed to deprive myself of anything. But it stands to reason, that certain foods, certain timing, and certain amount of load, make my body feel optimal. It's not that I can't eat anything I want. The timing though, it has just everything to do with how well I end up feeling at the end of a day. And quite frankly, I want to feel good enough to get that workout in everyday, knowing this will improve my goals.
 Sometimes it seems as if there's really not much to this. Then I get a reality check about mine own nutritional complication I bring into the picture, such as this evening, when Valrhona chocolate and raw almonds seemed to call me at the same time, and I begin to see the patterns and traps that most come to me for, in order to help them see a path through.
This summer was about going deeply within, but it was also about seeing how others share the light of similar struggles all around. I have finally decided to pick up my staff and lead people the way they were meant to be lead, through the nutrition walk with more intensity than before.

I joined a community called Integrative Nutrition. I am now on the road to becoming certified as a health and life coach. It gives me the chance to dig through a number of questionable systems and get the low down of the nutritional book writing industry. I really want to know why authors and doctors have come to their conclusions, and how I can make the whole process a little less confusing and a little more compromising, more loving and more interactive, a customized experience...just from the changes in timing I have noticed muscularity and build. There is so much more to say, but I'll stop here by saying that, from wherever you are, are, adding this nutrition piece to exercise is the perfect marriage. I took my first set of pictures and I am so excited to see the changes.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Harnessing Fitness Goals

Observe a dream...have a goal....commitment to the building of that plan.

Evenly distribute your energy across the entire landscape of your goal....and attack each piece, one at at a time.
I see many people struggling, or doing nothing, in the gym. I hear the cries of the uninspired, the lackluster, the motivationally challenged. I understand that getting to live with and love your fitness goals could not be the easiest thing to balance with career and family, school, study and sleep. But somehow, if this goal could literally improve the very quality of your life and keep you out of the doctor's office, couldn't it possibly be worth it to find a way to invest in your health to this degree?

Yes. Yes!!! Yes!!! Yes! do we get to this?

I was blessed with an early introduction to health and fitness from an early age. I realize that I owe whatever fitness discipline I have to my parents. I'll even give credit to my siblings. My father was a black belt in Karate and lifted weights in the backyard. As we watched "Wide World of Sports" (the thrill of victory, and the agony of defeat) and the Olympics, he seemed to have unrequited dreams I wasn't aware of. My mother danced and did yoga. She taught me to eat right, based on nutritional ideas of that era. My brother trained and wrestled in the 1984 Olympic trials. My brother and sisters were all belted in Karate and Judo, competed and trained. My sister who belted in Judo, also had an affinity for salsa dancing. She and I even taught a class together at a certain point! It seems as if we had a pretty athletically inclined family.Yes, my family has much to do with the continuing acquisition of my fitness quest.

Thing is, the rest of my life up to this point has been up to me. Of course, teaching dance, yoga, cycling, kickboxing, weightlifting and personal training had kept me going, and I threw in marathon training to the mix. But did I do too much? Or not enough, in the long run...

This is where technically, you could have stopped reading at that second line: Evenly distribute your energy across the entire landscape of your goal....and attack each piece, one at at a time. If it's not something you can sustain for an extended period of days per week and months, it may not be an overall attainable goal...not that goals aren't challenging, but that they should, to reiterate, be attainable.

So maybe this is a common, standard belief. Maybe even that common standard is also to keep your fitness balanced over a variety of disciplines and an overage of fruit and vegetables. Maybe we've all heard ad nauseum, to get a fitness buddy. But has that gotten you into your goal and attacking each piece? What rock bottom moment do you need to rock you and shake you into action?

One thing that motivates me is to dare myself to live my life without my fitness. I have imagined what others have gone through, be it pulled muscles, torn ligaments, illness, disease or an affliction, a physical handicap. I walk into a club and see a man in a wheelchair, clearly unable to ever stand, enjoying the music. It reminded me of wearing braces on my feet until I was 3 and being told I would never walk. It was the memory of being so sick through most of my elementary school life that I missed many days of school. It was the suffering of flat feet, scoliosis and hypoglycemia. At that moment I realize that life is meant to be lived and each moment is clearly representative of that. And for that, I am so grateful.

Does that mean the harnessing of that goal can take less time to accomplish? Honestly, I don't even think you would want the acquiring of that goal to be manifested so quickly. If you could truly snap your fingers and manifest weight loss for example, would you appreciate it and hold the energy of that appreciation across future outcomes? There are many lessons that would never be cemented without the struggle and the reach-up. Many world-class athletes have experienced depression after having shown their superiority, but not without years of blood, sweat, tears and probably a few primal screams of frustration. Either way, many will say they worked their whole life for that one goal. That's a lot of training sessions.

Ultimately I can hand you a plan, a goal and pick you up and go with you to the gym, but you have to find that reason, that overpowers all your other senses. It's the one that gets you to stop waiting to enjoy the health everyone deserves.

Chasing Greatness

My friend and I were watching one of the world's greatest Olympians, Michael Phelps,

....and the current fastest woman in the world, Shelly Ann Fraser Pryce.

Last but not least, Gabby Douglas, the first African American history-making gymnast...


The Olympics have always acknowledged, inspired and honored our world's greatest athletes, serving as a symbol of the reward for following one's dreams. Every event, every win and every loss, measures the level of commitment, ability, timing, luck, or all four. I remember wanting to be Nadia Comaneci while watching with the family, laughing, crying, and dreaming all the way through the two weeks of exciting events. This wonderful memory has followed me into my adulthood. I wanted to cry my eyes out several times during the big wins I witnessed this year in London, dreaming about being in the audience. My son leaned over and asked me, "Mom, can we go to the Olympics live one day?" A smile spread across my face as I entertained the idea...for more than one reason.

But just as soon as that joy entered, so did the concern of a current youth population that does not seem to be targeted for anything. With an excessive exposure to video games, music with violent or sexual themes and negative and uninspiring television images, what future is there for children? Many children don't even seem interested in watching the Olympics, nor do they have a desire to push when things get tough.

What about our adult population? I have heard of more people who sit on the couch after work than I would like to know about. What kind of a tomorrow are we setting ourselves up for? Are we even living in the Consciousness that this moment in our history is more important than ever? Do we know what will help us achieve a different, more inspiring end? Do we really want our epitaphs to have our couch history recorded, or something we did to bring our greatness to Light and help us to change the world?

What if EVERYONE in the world RIGHT NOW, was doing their part to work towards their own personal Greatness?

It is far too simplified to say that change can be tough. Change is complicated, involved, detailed, challenging, unpredictable, uncomfortable, and beautiful, perfect and very, very necessary. Think of what would happen to us if we never changed...we'd never leave diapers, have a first love, celebrate our parent's 50th anniversary, see our children be born. We'd never find the career of our dreams or have a 40th birthday. Even more interestingly, we wouldn't ever see the importance of having any crowning moments in our life. How did we know that these events held sacred power and were very important? Our families guided us. They taught us everything we know about our tribal power and what makes us who we are. Change is simply part of the matrix of our lives.

As I type this, just to drive the point home, I look up and see one Olympic runner's story. He never got to run his best or get a gold medal...or place at all, but he did finish it with his father.

Even as I make most of my discussion about the Olympics, Greatness does not need to be qualified with a gold medal or even a sport. Greatness comes from within. I realize that most people want a formula, design, a system to follow. But even if one is handed a system to follow, one must find the discipline and fortitude to even stick to the model. What formula really needs to be followed for Greatness to pour forth? One step...the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. I wanna say that Lao Tzu said that, but then again I'd give him credit for quite a lot, kind of like all the quotes found on Einstein. Did Einstein really say that? Who knows?
The only real thing we all know, is that Einstein, a poor example of a smart child, rose on to adulthood genius. He, at some point, felt called to explore his Greatness. Once he found it, it couldn't be stopped. It flowed on its own...he was even smart enough to know when his Greatness could have chaotic, destructive consequences, and that is when he took his efforts and rerouted himself away from people who didn't have his best interests in mind. So then, his Greatness was even larger than any of us can imagine, because he understood the sacred principle of aligning with our goals.

If nothing else can inspire us, hopefully one shining moment in someone else's life, can. One famous author, artist or scientist of a time past, can tell his or her story, and help us to make that visualization with clear details, that to-do list started, and that one small step crossed off the list, just one, only one, at a time.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Thoughts on the Chakras and Koshas

The chakras are the bridge to a higher level of consciousness. It is a road that leads us to the eventual end game of what we call Enlightenment. Although spiritual studies and understandings have led me to believe that Enlightenment only comes in inspired moments, a balanced view, exploration and experience of the chakras can only lead to a higher state of consistent “Enlightenment,” or balance, and that is the goal.

Each chakra comes with a variety of lessons, imbalanced and balanced expressions of the chakra. Each chakra gives a solid foundation upon which to build the next. Each chakra also expresses itself through the koshas. Let’s look at the chakras first from the pathway of the koshas.
As the chakras start at its basic need, so does this idea resonate with the koshas, which begin at the annamayakosha, or food and survival, tribal connectivity and procreation. This resonates with the first chakra in particular, represented by the color red, and resonating with basic foundational, physically and physiologically rooted concepts. The chakras also correspond to the physical position they gather in the body. The needs that the chakra expresses are supported there. In addition to this, your body’s endocrinology also resides in each chakra.
The sacral chakra, represented by orange, resides in the annamayakosha. The sacral chakra corresponds to the need to receive love and pleasure, luxury, family and relationships. It can also be the seat of addiction, housing balanced and imbalanced expressions of issues dealing with money such as hoarding, gambling, or stealing, sexuality (porn, affair energy) and wide ranging emotions.

At the level of the manomayakosha, emotions, mental states of expression are there. Also present is trauma and dysfunction emanating from the lower chakras, as a result of the imbalance being present for an extended period of time. We hope to remember in this moment that energy is neither created nor destroyed, it only changes form and is therefore stored. The chakras carry the energetic imprint of the mental and emotional states of consciousness. The energy of the 3rd and 4th chakra live here in this kosha. The 3rd chakra is responsible for discernment, discipline and boundaries, while the 4th chakra is the gateway to the higher chakras, opening up and losing the boundaries and limits, expressing the higher realms of existence through unconditional, personal and compassionate love. This to me is the eternal conflict of the chakras; however, there is that delicate interplay that needs to happen in order for the whole person to progress.

Depending on what the manomayakosha decides to do with this energy, it filters up and into the 5th and 6th chakras, or the vjnanamayakosha, the witness center. Having nestled its energy here, people have either a clear or muttled view of reality, reality being defined by experience in the lower chakras and expressed in its highest self in the higher chakras, no matter what its origin point. This is why the foundation must be strongly and solidly built, in order for bliss to occur.
The 5th chakra is the channel to a higher consciousness, and speaks for Source, Universe, God, Brahman. It is the seat of the higher plane, or even the legs on which to travel. The 6th chakra is the seer, the third eye, ajna chakra, whose aim is to light the path before it. So the 5th chakra often speaks for the 6th chakra when messages are needed to be sent. When someone feels they are receiving guidance, it is through this point that the guidance speaks and rains on the blessed.
As the 6th chakra is expressed, and the vision is spoken on and carried out into the world through the 4th and 5th chakra, bliss is achieved, in a balanced expression, in the 7th chakra. The imbalanced expression of the 7th chakra can be experienced as delusion, deception, spiritual arrogance, spiritual distortion such as cult-like mentality, obviously false perceptions parading as truth. Through repetition of karmic acts of service on the world, and there are plenty to serve, the 7th chakra can again be reinforced and beautifully expressed.
Through the practice of meditation and inner guidance, the soul can take us one step further into enlightenment, or the understanding of ideas not originally understood. Meditation opens the path, and inner guidance tells the soul how to navigate through the pieces. We are in a space to receive fabulous gifts of the Spirit with our willingness to listen and learn.
The chakra body mapping is a beautiful way to see in the physical space a picture of your soul. This guidance can make clear which areas of the chakra body are free flowing, and which ones are stagnant and in need of a shift. Core issues and challenges are addressed more fully when knowledge of the state of the chakras is present.
The yoga therapy process describes the root chakra as the embodiment within the journey, tuning our senses to the physical practice of yoga as a source of finding that embodiment, rootedness, and awareness on the physical plane. The chapter smartly discusses yoga as a system of balancing and stabilizing within specific postures (balance poses, or hip openers for direct massage of the root chakra, releasing of latent anger and limiting, long-held beliefs, for example).
Though we are more than our bodies, we can safely say that, if we look at the model of the koshas, we are able to develop our spiritual lives through this yoga practice and grow from there, as a seed grows upward from the soil. At its base, we find a coiled, latent kundalini energy that consists of Shiva (pure consciousness and transformation) and lingam, referring to latent potential. It would seem fitting to unearth this coil by massaging, moving, and uncoiling it, as a ripened vegetable would be unloosed from the earth to be made ready to consume. This makes clear that the root chakra would then be, by IYT’s definition, the basis of the journey, the foundation.

Aligning to Source in Everyday Life

Aligning to Source Consciousness can be as easy as plugging into a socket. It is only a matter of making the space in your day a ritual event, much as we do for our preparation to go to work: we awaken, we stretch our arms, shower, prepare our morning 'get-up' (coffee, tea, food), our lunch and bags, then we head out the door. If only we would take a portion of that morning to set our priorities for the day, before leaving our homes, all the way down to the detail.

Alignment is a conscious event. Setting an intention with focus and energy is the way of manifestation. It is not only the intention that makes something real, it is the action behind it. Not only do we need intention, focus and energy, we also need our manifestation tools. What are these? What do they mean in your life? What I use for manifestation may be something different for you. I use stones and crystals, prayer and prayer beads, sage and incense, pictures, a dream board, and an altar, a sacred space, that represents what I do and what I am manifesting. The tools you use must mean something to you.

Here is an example of my ritual. I awaken, open, bless and protect my sacred space with Angels. I do my breathwork, meridian tracing, and a couple of sun salutations. I set up my intentions and speak to them in the areas of family, friend and community intentions, organization and task management, my relationship, our finances, and then education and research. All of these things bear deep importance to me and affect the quality of my life intrinsically. Then I get even more specific and imagine my smooth, unblemished ride to work, my joyful communication with my leadership and coworkers, and my loving interaction with my students. I imagine my healthy lunch and my graceful exit from my day. I enjoy spending time and integrating my son into my life. I manifest the outcomes of my exercise efforts and see them as healing, empowering, and enjoyable. I then imagine a restful night with reading and contemplation before turning in.

The alignment with Source stays consistent when we recognize that the connection is a daily act, and can involve every experience in our life, as sacred, important, and carrying the ability to be manifest in the way we see fit. We need to manifest a way to make every area of our life carry the resonance of our purpose. This is the essence of Blissfully Fit.

Monday, July 23, 2012

The Goddess Sojourn: Breaking Through.

It's my 39th year in this Goddess incarnation, emerging 40 by the falling of the leaves, I was told the other day I appear to be 27, (God Love that human) and my Spirit guides are reaching for my hand more than ever before. My meditations are profoundly deepening. One night, I plunge into a sorrowful beckoning silence of the soul, the next morn, I emerge the joyful chattering Goddess.
...Okay. I'm being dramatic. (I have drama geek blood. It's really not my fault. I blame the state for offering drama in a college setting.) It did not exactly happen overnight. It really felt as if it had, though.

I've been deeply studying this summer, and life could not be any more poignant or complex or perfect, right now. I have been presented with a plethora of insights, challenges, choices, and potential outcomes. I've been asked to guide and counsel. I've been called to be a leader. I imagine this is not different from too many others, but it matters that I am answering the phone...because when looking back at my life, reading journal entries tell me that no, I wasn't always picking up, that I needed to reach for something greater than this. The thing is, we can spend our whole life reaching and never find it, if we don't listen to our higher self and the rain of blessings that fall with the christening of our highest and brightest intentions for ourselves and others.
Also, if we have old, unresolved issues and cluttered and unclear vision of our future, we might as well just throw in the towel and go back to sleep, if we think those fragmented pieces can stay with popularity in the house of new growth.
 I have often thought of the process of how we get to our greatness, as one equally great "baldheaded Asian" used to say. The resulting idea was that for one, we begin with the things we call jobs (obviously for money), then careers (the interest du jour, or the build up to the vocation), then the vocation, the thing you'd do without any pay at all. Things have definitely gotten interesting with the addition of a new-ish pursuit of a business.

I went back and discovered that my ideas of owning my own business go back as far as my grade school days. I was so clearly one of those children who were born knowing what they were meant to do.

"Whatever it is, I'll teach it," was the mantra I gave to my mother, and other family and friends. My dear cousin Charles (whom I've always thought of as an uncle) would always ask me when I would make it in the movies and be a star, while my sister just recently expressed how she had been patiently waiting for me to "make it." I relish my memories fondly and place all of my intention, focus and energy on the ritual to come, the preparation, proper care and feeding of this new beast, holistic heallth. It's the last bastion of health for a failing American system, and we simply need to be aware of the coming changes we face in health care. Pros and cons surround our fate.
 We need to be ready as lightworkers for the wave of ill lifestyles turning into illness, opened by excited and enlightened individuals begging us for our services. It is all uniquely important to each person and lightworker, to be ready to hold space for the revolution that's changing the way we do things. Ultimately, we are swinging back in a pendular shift to an older, more precious time in the way we cared for our wellbeing. If we know how to care for ourselves holistically, we are immediately responsible for teaching and leading others to do the same. It is part of an evolved moral consciousness that, if all of us sign on, more people can have the choice of health, instead of focusing on which surgery we've chosen.

No matter what food has been brought to my table, savory or not, as Mooji would say, just say Thank You. The studies have deeply captivated my senses and have put me to work in a new way, bringing me to a place of greater identity as I face my 40th birthday head on with clarity. I know that things must change and seasons dissipate into new ones. I am feeling a measurable amount of pleasure and success, and have had success markers such as degree conferrals and friends and paychecks that show me the progress I'm achieving steadily. My life may not yet appear to be everything I could hope for at this moment, but this moment is amazing and it's all I need to know, in order to be happy now.

I don't know how or why anyone would ever choose the main road. The road less traveled always ends up having some powerfully shifting nuances built into the fabric of the journey, making the destination all that much sweeter. And by the way, I love cliches, because no matter how often they're said, they have been repeated to this point because they are unceasingly authentic. Namaste.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Diary of a Wimpy Teacher.

It tends to be the teacher who minds her own business the most, that seems to also attract the most negative attention from the most insecure ones, or so it seems the case today. As I write this blog I am reminded of the searing, nuclear disruption to my morphic field as she walked in, projecting all of her pent-up frustration about her family life, her weight, her fears, her feelings of needing intimacy and feeling rather unattractive, and decided to contrast that against my cool, relatively composed stoic teacher "it's Monday, let's start fresh" mode,  in preparation for the toughest, most ridiculous class of my day: the 7th grade hell raisers. After all, they had to be hell raisers because Heaven hadn't appeared to have smiled on them in the least. Anywho...

I had finally settled the class enough to speak, issuing the game plan for the day's adventure. Suddenly, a large whoosh of calamity rushed in right before I got a chance to speak. Boys were sent out, and a teacher whose name will have to just roll in my mind aimlessly and questioningly, swung her body into my room and proclaimed, "what are these boys doing outside your room?" Her fierce interruption was enough to wonder if the four horsemen of the Apocalypse would follow. I returned with "um, I needed to start class without their interruption. Is there an issue?" She proceeded to tell me how they were interrupting her class (she doesn't have one) and were downstairs making faces in a window (actually, the kids told me what they did themselves). I thanked and apologized to her, not that I could understand why she was in my room on the third floor at all, and she raises her voice, asking, "What are you going to do about them?" Now far be it from me to do this to another professional, so I said in my best tone, " I will handle the problem as soon as I begin class. Thank you for telling me." She yells this time. "because they can't be running around the halls!" "Excuse me, I'm trying to start class!" I answer, this time visibly flustered. "So am I!" She yells, and storms out as she pushed the students back in.

By this time, I realized I'd had quite enough, and didn't need to have that issue bother my hour any further, and yet I couldn't stop the training from rolling because it would have otherwise jumped its tracks. I followed her out, and I added to my frustration, loudly stating, " I have never been so disrespected by another professional and to top it off, in front of my KIDS??" Much to my surprise, this teacher of this supposed 25 years of stature, education, superiority and history in teaching answers me with "so what?" "SO WHAT???" At this point I was just flabbergasted by her response. I got called dumb and insignificant, then tried to say something about being equals, to which I reply, "EQUALS?? OH NO LADY, WE ARE NOT EQUALS. I would NEVER have done that to you." At which point, I stormed back into the room.

Apparently, the Universe sometimes gives us these opportunities to state forcefully to the world who we are and how we are to be treated. When I returned to my classroom, the one thing I felt sure and awesomely solid about, was the fact that I would always, from that point on, hold a solid, loving boundary with those who choose to indulge themselves in the luxury of a whirlwind of projective despair. Alas, though I triumphed in the boundaries department, I epically failed in another, which was the securement of rising above that which tries to oppose us, show us jealousy, anger, or any uncontrolled emotion or act. My fortress was shattered. The lesson that now haunts me is to be the dependable stoic leader, when the chips are down, and to reinforce, at the first sign of attack.

As for that sad teacher? I have a book recommendation for her. It's called Why People Don't Heal, and How they Can, by Caroline Myss. Oh, and I'd also suggest a cup of tea, if this could help to assuage savage nerve attacks toward said victimized, successful goddesses. Namaste.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

To sleep, to dream, to drink tea.

As I type, the empty cup stares at me. I'm thirsty. I am sure this is a metaphor for something, and then again, maybe as arbitrary and capricious as the moment I decided to stay up another minute. I only plan to type for the next two, however, and allow this to be what might be a decidedly unfinished, rambling post about how I wanted another cup of tea, and yet did not oblige.
The fun thing about a blog, is that the typed word does not necessarily need to make sense, although it might help viewers venture back...a bit...or forward...a bit more...I'm still thirsty. Shall I have more tea, or a nap and meditation at this point?
There is one thing I know for sure. Although our minds and hearts read, study and tend to ramble, though there may be something meaningful to this, nothing seems to run so deeply as the mindless, soundless, breathless, detached, and yet fully alive, cup of tea. Cheers to the empty glass.

It's two minutes past my naptime. I may find my tea there.

Monday, April 16, 2012

1a Tea Tryst

The tea sneaks out of slumber surreptitiously in the wee hours, hoping only to disturb those who stir and shift from such liquid ambrosia-like pleasure...

1:22a. I snack on a low carb tortilla, cheese and avocado. I'm not sure of why I'm feeling so hungry, but I do know that afterwards, I choose a fine, hot cup of Gyokuro sencha, realizing my neural stirrings are occurring with about the same intensity as they were when I last posted about tea. Even then, the post was about exactly the same leaf. Funny. Or is it?

Consciousness has a way of bringing things full circle.

I'm thinking that I am quite possibly hungry because I am (a) procrastinating, (b) full of a pot of tea and now my metabolism has been accelerated, (c) I need to drink water instead of eat or (d), I am truly hungry.
But then I realize I had not consumed enough proteins today, and that could also explain the sudden (yummy!) snack eaten at such a time. This is unlike me, and yet, we spent the entire day at an amusement park themed around one of those mini scavengers with big ears and beady eyes. This is also not how a normal weekend for me goes, so much.

I was thinking that the sure key to my success was to eat and work, and that I would be more successful at task completion. So far, all I've managed to do is make myself sleepy, which was probably going on before. And so I sit. And sit. I type a blog which is NOT on my current list of to-dos. And I drink the tea because it speaks to me.

Would you like to know what the tea had the Nerve to say? ...Change. That's all. Just change. Then I have one of those thoughts I go to (my go-to thought) that completely obstructs me from doing ANYTHING ELSE. Or, alternatively, I have a hazy feeling that ends my struggle and folds me over onto my computer console immediately. No, not arsenic, but sleep. Pure, unadulterated, unrelenting, endless waves of nausea-inducing sleep. You may wonder how sleep can induce nausea. Well it only happens when you are a certain willful person who doesn't like the feeling of letting go and allowing something to happen, all whilst deeply loving and accepting that person. But I digress. And there I go typing with closed lids again. That takes some talent and practice.

Tea makes you one with all without anyone asking, apparently.

You see, the tea, she cheated on me. She was supposed to help me stay awake and it looks like she let me into deep meditation. Does this mean path block, obstruction, or simple case of needing to be asleep more than needing to be awake? I go back to my tea cup to drink the last cup. She is cold. Boy is she cold.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

It's 2:14 in the morning....

...the FB conversation got boring...yeah, I should probably creep into sleep, that land of the proverbial dreams, the ones I rarely have, but in lieu of Spring, have seemed to have an entire new onslaught of random dream state ramblings and other such antics. But I digress. This conversation was meant to be about tea.

I have gotten into quite the peculiar otherworld state with the tea, so much so, that it has taken my typing tips out of retirement and back onto the precious keypad, memories of her movement await. Here I am...and also here is the tea. I retrace my steps to a possibly simpler time and I see myself pregnant again, sitting at my breakfast table in the early morn, enjoying a pot of Irish Breakfast tea and feeling so grateful that my life is what it was at the time. My then hubby and I shared a two bedroom apartment with a cat and a baby on the way. Everything being retraced, all of the energy there and memories. But what do I remember? That delicious cup of Irish breakfast tea with a bit of evaporated milk and a heavy body to the tea. I remember enjoying the delightful spin I would have as I thoughtful munched on fruit and planned the dinner meal for when the hubby would return to the cave....such a mixed bag of emotions, however raw, still centered around the Master of Ceremonies, the tea.

She and I have had a rather admirable and at times trying and then exciting trysts within the relationship, but it always seemed to somehow work out in the love for the tea and her love for the cup. We would always meet the teapot, the table, the body, the cup, the critic ready to sing her praises for the full bodied, malty flavors of Assam and the brassy, astringent properties of the Ceylon, so on and whathaveyou. All the subtle nuances of tea have left subtle imprints in all the right places in my consciousness, quietly cataloging the moments where, in spite of the vagueness words can bring, she was my life, the color in the pencil, the pigment in the crayon. Realistically, we would never part.

...But then we did which, indeed, turned out to be a rather woeful moment, though I do not think my conscious mind registered this. I think it, in fact, did not register it to the point of completely allowing the tea, after all it had truly done for me, to just slide through my fingers. How could I let it slip away? I feel it had attributed itself to potential weight gain at every bite, every slice of pizza and every bar of chocolate. Had I done this? Well I certainly hadn't realized myself for it. But oh, the bites you get in just when you thought, is this it? Is this all I can take?? Bamm. Then hits the awakening of the consciousness you already possessed, simply because of the meditation of the tea.

It seems that every powerful, cataclysmic, shifting or life changing event creates a chain reaction of events seemingly unrelated to the initial spark, but all intensely, passionately intertwine...the tea being the central point, and the baby the life change, while the relationship was at its crux, or rather, soon to be actualized some several years later, to the demise of the relationship, even as I dared to continue sipping the tea. The loudnes of the boom, the quiet before the storm, as the tea went in, and took me into meditation.

And from it, I drew the discovery of the name Kai, my son, Hawaiian in origin. My middle name Irish, attributed to my current BF who is destined and earmarked for maybe a slather more, and an apartment whose time is come to manifest into a new space built for two adults in the current financial and relationship climate. Only now we are visiting a very green, very costly, first flush premier drink, gyokuro sencha, and sencha premier. So green, so vegetal, so delicious.

I drink the tea and wonder whether my passion lies in the actual hot drink or in the memory and lessons encoded within each cup.